Things I like About the UK, Vol. 1

Crumpets with fake butter and Lyle’s Golden Syrup; Liverpudlian accents; footie on telly all the time; being able to live in the same country as my cute boyfriend; gravy granules; proximity to mainland Europe; trains that go anywhere I want to go and on which I can take my bike; Primark; rolling, green hills dotted with fluffy, white sheep; delicious strawberry monkey licorice from the Aldi; the word “poorly” to mean “sick”, as in “no, Perpetua is not in the office today; she’s off poorly”; refrigerated grocery store vegetable samosas that you can just pop in the oven that are better than restaurant samosas; London; tea that gets so instantly strong that I have to ask for it weak when someone else makes it; Scottish accents; our sweet apartment; an abundance of inexpensive leeks; all things Robin Hood; panel “game shows” where famous people rack up points by saying really funny things in response to the host’s questions, but nobody really cares who wins; “brilliant,” said gazillions of times a day, meaning something similar to “fantastic” or “sweeeet”- sometimes shortened to “brill”; vegan bangers and mash; David Beckham- oh wait- he moved!; nail polish remover pads from Boots; more sheep; QE2...